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A few months ago, your nanny job ended. What happened?
I was nannying and had been kind of struggling with it for about a year at that point. It just got to a point where I couldn’t make it work. I did a lot of coaching with you about navigating and manifesting my way through those things, but none of it worked.
Why wasn’t it like “Let me get a new job?”
I had been force-telling myself that I could manifest it to be better. I could force a bad situation to be good instead of just exiting the situation into a better situation. And because a similar situation had happened in my last nanny job, I thought that I was the common denominator, so I should fix myself within the job. But really, I needed just to exit the field of nannying.
There were parallels between your last relationship and your relationship with that boss, tell us about that.
My boss lacked compassion for me and my experiences within that job. Similar things happened with my ex-boyfriend all the time. He had no compassion or flexibility in any part of the world or his life, especially with me. So I experienced similar reactions from both my boss and my ex - when I asked for things I needed I would be met with resistance and anger.
If I had coached you and told you, “Why don’t you just quit this job?” What would you have said?
I probably would have said, “No, I can fix this. This is a pattern and I’m determined to break this pattern where I am.” I felt the only way a pattern could be fixed was within the situation itself. But I had grown so much that I had become a square peg, so I was no longer going to fit into a round hole, no matter how much self-work I did.
I had become another person, and really she needed me to leave for her to break into the person she was becoming too. My leaving left her the space to step into that easier life she was creating too.
Tell us about the break that happened.
I was on vacation with them, and things got difficult. She had a sit-down conversation with me and asked me right out, “Are you happy working for us anymore?” and there was no other answer I could’ve given her except the truth, “No.” It was a very uncomfortable and rocky experience, but I still felt a huge sense of relief that I no longer had to try to fix this situation. I was uncomfortable with how it ended, but I felt free for the first time in years.
What about the money?
It was all ok. I had spent 5 years in ELU learning how to save and building up my savings, and thanks to that, I was able to continue living the same lifestyle I had before. I had enough savings to cover myself for the space I had between jobs. Thankfully, I have written such a great new money story that it supported me beautifully between jobs during a time when I wasn’t getting any direct income.
It was a little uncomfortable in all of that space. Cassie gave me coaching that getting comfortable in this space that I had created was what was going to manifest what I wanted. Sure enough, once I leaned into getting comfortable in that space, I started feeling better, and I manifested the perfect job for me at that time, and I started taking clients right after.
What does “holding the space for the best-fit job” mean?
For me, that meant not allowing myself to spend hours scrolling Indeed for jobs. To stay out of the panic and worry that comes with those hours of rabbit hole job searching. If I had filled up the space between jobs with that hyper fixation on getting a new job, that would not have gotten me the best-fit job for me. And it wouldn’t have felt good; it would have felt yucky. So I did a lot of consciously choosing “I am not going to fill up my space right now. I am choosing to be present in my house. What do I want to do right now?”
Next episode, we’re going to talk about “Best fit” vs. “Perfect” job. We’ll give you some more concrete tips.
Vicki:
Instagram @vickinotvicky
TikTok @vickinotvicky10k
Enchanted Life U:
Instagram: @ enchantedlifeu
TikTok @enchantedlifeu
